Welcome to the death of a century…


If there’s one question I hate during interviews, it’s What would you consider to be your weakness? You know why I hate it?? Because an employer is basically asking me to lie to their face. People always give the same answer, Oh I have a hard time leaving my work in the office at the end of the day. I need to learn how to say no to my co-workers when they need help. They basically try to make their only weakness a strength. You know what my work weaknesses are??

If I have to pick up pens at staples I leave two hours early to do it.

I play Candy Crush Saga for a large part of my workday.

I drink too much and come to work hung over ALL THE TIME!!!!

My favorite thing about coming to work is walking around the office socializing everyone.

The other day at work I called a cartoon character a whiny little cunt  in front of a five-year old kid.

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I actually own a mug just like this.

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90’s Grading Day Extravaganza!


Even though I’m 30 and graduated from High School almost 12 years ago, I still really miss Grading Day. It was the best time ever, I would walk around the town of New Glasgow getting free stuff  with my friends. We would hit up Big Al’s for Slush, Needs for Chips, McDonald’s for a Cheese Burger…The list just went on and on! And then as if I wasn’t rewarded heavily enough for something I was supposed to do regardless, I would come home to a sweet Grading Day present! The following are some of the amazing gifts my parents shelled out for once a year…

deliasAn edgy alternative outfit from Delia’s!!!

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A Caboodel that I would fill with all my Bonnie Bell makeup. Usually consisting of cinnamon lipstick, a Vanilla Lip-Smacker  gloss and a foundation 4 shades lighter than my skin tone because I had no idea how to select makeup shades at the time and some Wet-n-Wild mascara for good measure.

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Transit was the coolest store in the Highland Square Mall, for Grade Six Graduation my best friend Ashleigh and I asked for matching platform clogs as our gift. I had black ones, she had brown. We were so cool!

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2 for 40 Crew-neck Club Monaco Signature Sweatshirts! I had a green and a grey one. You didn’t actually wear the shirt though, you just tied it around your waist. But you had to make sure the logo was facing everyone. Other wise you were just walking around town with a lame sweatshirt looking like a loser.

 

 

It’s an upsetting day for white girls.


Amanda Bynes, I’ve officially given up on you. I would go so far to say that you’re in worse shape than old Side Titty Lohan. And that saddens me.

ab1Remember when you were smoking hot and made movies that made me feel good about being hungover??

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And then you had your first run in with the law that you could have easily bounced back from.

amanda-bynes-2013-4But instead you went from this to this?

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And then took it a step further by rearranging your face so that you would look like a  transvestite hooker .

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Lets go back to the good days and film a Shes the Man part 2.

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Because this is what too much plastic surgery and being a fucking weirdo does to your face…

For the record, I have never met this girl…


Welcome to New Glasgow, where a news paper article about a local woman winning a reality show turns into a forum for local idiots to misspell words and comment on their hatred of  the Wellness Center?!?

If you’re complaining about Jillian winning Big Brother a week after the fact, it’s not because you’re so concerned about upholding the strong morals and ethics of reality television, it’s because you’re a jealous cunt.  I love the comments about being a bad role model for kids. What kind of parent lets their young child stay up past 11 on school night to watch a show with adult content anyway?? That’s like sitting your kid next to me at a restaurant when I’m hungover and getting mad at me for all my swears.

jobsThis is how I view a large majority of Pictou County Residents

You can subdue, but never tame me .


Sometimes I wonder how teenage girls can get so ape shit over The Biebs , but then I look back on my 90’s crushes. I totally would have had trouble breathing at a shopping mall from over crying if I had the chance to see any one of these guys !

teen1South Western inspired vest , giant wagon wheel, golden arch bangs… The Art Director of Bop magazine knew how to get a 13-year-old excited!

teen2Andrew Keegan had the same hair cut  and clothing style as all the girls in my grade six class at Acadia Street. No wonder we loved him so much!

teen3Imagine getting to share a milk shake with our generations Chris Brown, wouldn’t that be a real treat!!!!

teen5I would have loved to be on set while this outfit was  decided on. OK, we’re gonna have Rider put his foot on top of the globe so better get some sweet sandals. I also want to see him in an over sized dress shirt to make his top look bigger, but soccer shorts, so we can show off his pencil legs.

teen4I like the direction they went with on this one. South West meets Romantic. Normally Tiger Beat and Bop had JTT holding a soccer ball in front of a computer ( because that’s what all teenage boys have in their hands when in front of a computer) or posing with his arms crossed leaning against something.  It’s like he’s saying Hey girl, I picked these chrysanthemums just for you.