24 Hours Until Saucy Fingers!


I’m working in Tronny for the rest of the week, here are some things I’m looking forward to…

Buying a bag of Cheezies, opening them up before I leave for the day and then eating stale Cheezies in bed when I get back to the hotel.

Duff’s Saucy Fingers. Last time I had a round of Saucys I had fish tacos just a few hours earlier so I couldn’t finish my meal. I plan on redeeming myself this weekend!

Visiting the Cheese Store in Kensington Market…Working on my night cheese…

Visiting with the Edison Twins again!!!

Alone time chicken wings for dinner every night. I’m really hoping Duff’s bottles their sauce so I can take some home to SB.

Steam Whistle Beer

I might also be thinking about taking an Alone Time Brewery Tour.

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Paul et les jumeaux


It’s Friday and I’ve got a decent weekend lined up. Not only is Gus having a shindig tonight where I will get to hangout with the likes of Hazel, UF Lee and Hazel’s Wool, but I will finally be meeting The Edison Twins !!!!!

Brethren Lewis and his Wife are visiting for the weekend, I have waited forever to meet these two. In preparation for the event I didn’t drink a bottle of red wine last night because I didn’t want to be hung over when I held them for the first time. I think that takes a lot of commitment on my behalf and shows how good of a person I am, as I love Thursday night wine binges. It’s just one of the many steps I have taken to secure my place as Number One Aunt.

I love a good Kelly Clarkson jam!


Amanda Bynes, I’m rooting for you here I really am. I could careless that you like weed but you gotta tighten up sister. Your career is about to end and I’m pretty sure your She’s the Man money is running pretty low at the moment. You are my favorite of the Child Stars mainly because unlike most of them, you didn’t grow up to be ugly.

When Lindsay Lohan starts calling you out, you need to change. That’s the equivalent to me sitting someone down to talk about their drinking problem. What kind of low has a person reached when I’m in a place to tell them they need to grow up??

Fuck I hate these two.

Unless you have alopecia it is not OK to draw your eyebrows on.


If today’s youth could learn one thing from my generation, it needs to be eyebrow grooming techniques… And making sure they don’t follow in our footsteps.

Back in 1994 when I was in Junior High Latino street cred had reached its peak. Girls would want to mimic this look by plucking their eyebrows  to a state of non-existence and then draw a heavily arched thick browline back on over a pound and a half of Covergirl foundation. Complimented by some god awful shade of Bonnie Bell lipstick and a darker liner.

Nerds like myself had another eyebrow icon. Kerri from Days of Our Lives. She had the greatest eyebrows ever. Only I was too scared to pluck or wax mine to mimic hers, so I just took it upon myself to shave my eyebrows into that shape… I did a decent job but to this day I have the worlds worst unibrow that requires constant upkeep.

 

Seriously young girls, unless you want to look like a makeupless Marilyn Manson when you get older, don’t fuck with your eyebrows.

My what an amazing tan you have yourself there!


I think I pick on her so much because she gets to have casual sex with Prince Harry. I would totally snoop around his castle the second I was left alone!

Nope, that’s not someones sexy mom. It’s 18-year-old Courtney Stodden!

I’m 1/10th Italian Bro!

I bet she enjoys Green Deaths almost as much as she does tanning!