Sorry for missing yesterdays post. Wednesday was a a horrible day for me. So horrible in fact my amazing boyfriend came home with a Christmas Plant and a bottle of Diet Pepsi that I could drink one time consequence free. I’m not gonna lie. The Diet Pepsi was amazing and I sucked it back like no ones business.
I don’t know whats wrong with me, I only have another 6 weeks to go with the Diet Pepsi Challenge. I’m in the home stretch but I think about it everyday. This isn’t the kind of thing you suffer through for the first month then get over it and never want to touch it again. Yesterday when I held the bottle to my mouth SB asked me if I really wanted to go through with it. How could I not? It had already hit my lips. In my mind a montage of all the good times I had with Diet Pepsi played over.
I had visions of sitting at KFC nursing my hangover with a Fountain Diet Pepsi, watching a grown man eat a bag of white bread while standing in line. Hiding it in a mug at work so people wouldn’t judge me. Drinking a 2L out of the bottle on my couch while shoving an entire Domino’s thin crust pepperoni and mushroom into my mouth on my once Dateless Friday Nights. When the clock strikes twelve on New Years Eve, I’m opening a can up and sucking it back in less than a minute. I don’t even plan on drinking this New Years because I want to remember the moment I was reunited with first love Diet Pepsi.
SJP enjoying a Diet Pepsi
I’m a little nervous today, I’ve got some pretty big stuff going on. Enjoy my inspirational video link dumps…
I can’t tell if this song is getting me pumped up to face a jerk or makes me want to walk around town smashing things.
I’m throwing up Danzig air punches right now.
I go to court when I have to…
Sometimes I get a little pouty over the fact I don’t have a baby, but then I realize that I want a baby…not a kid. I don’t have patience for a child. Babies are easy they sleep all day. They can’t sass you or ask for your money and you don’t have to reason with them when you want them to be quiet.
I also know I would make a terrible parent because when I hear my friends reasoning with their kids over the consequences of not doing something I say to myself… ” If that was my kid, I’d just scare the crap out them.” I wouldn’t say things like ” Do you want to have a time out when you get home tonight, if you don’t eat your dinner you’re gonna get one.”
Fine don’t eat your supper, go hungry. Then social services will come pick you up and you’ll be hungry all god dam day when your living in a orphanaige.
If you don’t start behaving I’m gonna send for the ghost of Ray Charles and he will drag you back to hell with him. Because if you don’t sit down and stop hitting people, that’s going to happen.
Little Rebecca Junior…
This morning my new boots were hit by a dirty old styrofoam container that was housing poutine covered in ketchup. I was able to remove the stain but I’m still fucking grossed out. For one, ketchup is the most disgusting condiment ever created. Two, anyone who puts it on top of a poutine should get their fucking head checked. Other items I can’t stand to see ketchup on include.
Roast Beef or Chicken
Unless you currently live in the town of Trenton, Nova Scotia, it is never ok to eat Ketchup Chips.
Oooohhhh Mama. I hit the jackpot at Sobeys on Queen Street last night. They had an unmanned sample booth that was dealing out butter fudge. And you better believe I helped myself to more than just one piece.
It has inspired me to spend hours looking up fudge recipes at work to pass the time. Filling a seat these days is getting harder and harder. The absence of MTV’s Teen Mom and Jersey Shore has left a little void in my work week. I need to find a new online show to start watching. I think NBC might air Days online, if so I’m gonna look into it. That will take up one hour of each day. My work dream come true would be to stumble upon a website that has episodes of Another World the greatest soap to ever be cancelled.
Today is off to a great start. I’ve got coupons for Quiznos! Buy one large Pulled Pork Sub get the second for FREE!!!!
I like to consider myself a connoisseur when it comes to Pulled Pork. Bone Heads has by far the best Pulled Pork in town. It comes with a choice of two sides and Corn Bread! Sometimes when I want to eat a large amount of food but I know I should be ashamed of myself for doing so, I make Slutbanger dare me to do it. I’m thinking a challenge involving five Pork Sandwiches from Bone Heads might be in my future.
Five of these tasty little fuckers?? No problem.
I can not stress enough how little I care about the death of Michael Jackson or that Black Guy found guilty for killing Michael Jackson. I’m just gonna say it…
I didn’t give a shit when that anorexic shell of a 50-year-old white woman died. I don’t give a shit now. Given that his last hit was in the early 90’s his death has in no way affected my life on any level what so ever.
This photo has nothing to do with today’s post. I just wish NBC would bring Hang Time back.